FIRE YOUR INNER CRITIC
“Speaking your truth can save others, but first it will save you.” – Regina Brett
I have started my blog, because I have personal development goals, but also because I feel a need to create. Unfortunately, I am not lucky to be in receipt of skills like singing or painting. I also started my blog, because writing was always somewhere near me. I often heard people saying that I should write. However, my relationship with writing has always been very ambivalent. I enjoyed it and I loved sharing my thoughts with people this way and I sometimes even believed that I have some kind of talent for writing. Not a huge talent, but a bit of a gift. Like I am not totally bereft of it. 
Anyway, I will use it no matter how big it is. Moreover, I can transform it and make it greater. At the end of the day it is a gift and I feel gratitude for it.
So, when I started this blog, I committed myself to write at least 2 posts a month and send 2 emails a month to people who subscribed to my newsletters. I have made that decision to help me stay consistent and motivated.
Last week I was going to publish a post about fluoride and I had it almost finished, when I changed my mind. I got into so much self- doubt that in the end I was unable to edit it, correct it and post it on my blog. I simply found it really bad written. I became my biggest critic and decided to change the topic from scientific one to more personal. I thought that if I write about fluoride for people who read my blog, it has to be presented at least at academic level, with all references, citations and with all that professional methodology.
I put so much pressure on myself that I wasn’t able to even read it again, because it seemed so terribly written. Although I do not put any references at the end of my blog posts, I always read and critically evaluate the research in terms of methodology, sample size, etc. I do not rely on easy to find “facts” on google. My blog posts are not academically written, but I make every effort to offer a solid dose of quality knowledge. I love sharing with you what I read, what I know and what can help us live healthier and happier. My plan is to start including the references in my articles in the near future anyway. Writing blog posts more often will help to improve my writing skills, so even more discipline is needed to achieve this. Just a quick reminder: one step at the time!
Today, I am looking at the problem from a distance. Maybe it was a crap piece of writing. 
But it is not what should bother me. This blog has come out of a passion for creating, healthy lifestyle and connecting with people who are or want to become more mindful of their everyday choices towards health and wellbeing. Healthy lifestyle is not only the quality of our food, it is also the quality of how we manage pressures of everyday life. Last week, I forgot that I can only make one step at the time and I was falling over every time I was trying to speed my progress up. I didn’t focus enough on the importance of the MOMENT. I forgot how to truly live. I was rushing, pressuring and putting myself down. There was a lot of unnecessary drama about doing more research for my posts, not being educated enough, not writing good enough or not knowing much enough to write a good blog. There was a lot of negative thoughts what others will think of me, my writing style and my blog.
Get ready for some rejection, get ready for some negative comments, get ready for some mean people, but do not let it bother you."– Sarah Glover
Over the weekend, I intentionally focused on different things to give my mind a rest instead of forcing it to produce some valuable content. I re-planted my aloe vera succulents, discovered 2 new ones in a large pot and took care of the old ones, as they got brown at the tips. Apparently, they had too much sunshine in my conservatory, so I moved them into the living room. I juiced some of their leaves and made a hair mask of it. I was thinking about my priorities and goals again. I re-evaluated my current life-situation. I also visited beautiful places in Cumbria, had lunch in Grasmere and even met an author of a lovely book on meditation for children’s. I think I manifested some inspiration, reflection and calmness. I started reading a new book and got back to the old one that really inspires and motivates me to writing. And actually, even before the weekend, I managed to create a valuable newsletter that I am quite proud of. I’ve literally appreciated this now!
Although, I might not write good enough, I will be writing anyway. Although, I am not a doctor or a nutritionist, I will be writing about nutrients and health anyway. Although, I am not a chemist, I will be writing about toxins anyway. Although, I might not know enough, I will be speaking my truth anyway.
Write and do not think too much about it. If you have something to say to this world, say it. Some will laugh at you, some will hate, some will ignore it, but some will listen. Do it for them. If there is a slight chance that your truth can help someone, say it, write it, show it. Speak your truth. Writing from your heart, without judging your own thoughts and spontaneously going with a flow might help others to find the truth within themselves and give them courage to speak up as well. Forget about your fears, your ego and your limitations and do it for others.
“A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor.”- Franklin D. Roosevelt
There will be more self-doubts moments, dramas, crisis’s on the way. They are a part of the process. No matter, whether it is a process of becoming a better parent, making carrier, evolving better skills in your hobby or blogging. It is about the awareness that the bad moments will pass and about aiming for improvement and most of all about enduring in the most difficult moments of the journey. There is no place for coziness in this process, but there must be a room for self-believe and trust in uncertainty and destiny.
If you write from your heart you don't have to do in depth research. Just focus on reflecting your soul. You never know who you might inspire.
Happi
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